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The Biggest Break-Up of the 21st Century

(Well, ok, maybe the second-biggest, after Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston.)

For years, I’ve been happy, in a monogamous relationship with a certain Mr. Food Processor. However, I’ve recently decided to end my relationship with Mr. Food Processor* because I’ve met someone else.Who is this elusive “someone” else? Why, it’s this guy:

Sure, Mr. FP and I were in love and all, but how can you compete with a guy who makes ice cream, hot soups, nut butters, and thick, creamy smoothies in less than 30 seconds?! Answer: You can’t! Sorry, Mr. FP.

*When contacted about this story, a rep for Mr. FP did not return phone calls.

This could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship…

Published on June 12, 2008

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  1. Jenn says

    Haha I must say, I am not shocked at the break-up…mainly because I have a Vitamix too and know that the grass really is greener on the other side :o) Can’t wait to see the ice cream!

  2. Eric says

    Very cool! I’m in the market for a food processor, or something to chop up and process stuff. I do all my chopping by hand and I hear there is a better way.

    Does this Vitamix only make shakes and smoothies, or will it blend and chop stuff too?

  3. healthyceliac says

    A Vitamix!!
    I am SO jealous, and you’re so lucky. Don’t tell Mr. FP, but you totally made the right decision 🙂

  4. Jenny says

    Oh, man. YOU GOT A VITA MIX??? I have to say, I am pretty jealous. No, I think I am very jealous. But I currently have a blender and a food processor, so it seems silly to go out and get a new appliance. Unless mine mysteriously break…

  5. Healthy eating blog says

    aw gee, im SO sorry about your breakup, but hey, you deserve better than him! LOL!! i also wanted to tell you that youve inspired me to become vegan, ive just made the announcement on my blog! i dont know if youve ever seen but that MADE my final descesion tobecome vegan! thanks for your insperation,im SO much happier! 🙂 <33

  6. babycakes says

    I just purchased the very same Vitamix. I am madly in love and have been in vegan-smoothie heaven since it arrived! There is nothing that beautiful machine can’t do! Congrats on your very wise purchase 🙂

  7. Healthy eating blog says

    good news,i told my dad i was going vegan and it was MY choice! 🙂 although he DID say i wasnt allowed to buy a ton of vegan products, skip going out to dinners on weekends, or try to bring people down with me, witch is all fine with me!! you are a great friend/insperation!! 🙂 <33

  8. Theresa says

    Aww, poor Mr FP. If Australia and America had the same voltage, I would offer to take him off your hands! But, it’s probably the best for my guy, Mr Stick Blender.

  9. Rural Vegan says

    Well, what can I say? Mr. FP was getting a little old and you were swept off your feet by a sleeker, younger model. It happens. Congrats on the Vitamix!

  10. springsandwells says

    I am filled with materialistic envy for your Vitamix. I’ve wanted one for such a long time, but can’t afford one yet. Hmmm… I’m stuck with the Food Processor!

    Have FUN!

  11. Katie says

    We have a Vitamix at my house too! I love it. It’s an old one though, made of all metal. Come to think of it, it is one intense blender :]

  12. Veg-a-Nut says

    I so would love to break up with my Mr. FP, but Mr. VM is way out of my price range. He is on my list of wants so I am hoping some day he will make his way into our home. You are once lucky gal!

  13. Emma says

    Hi Katie- no worries about the email I have just got back from my holiday so am just catching up with things myself!

    You will be able to make some great treats with the Vitamix- I cannot wait to see some pictures!

  14. CeciLiA says

    WOW Vitamix makes ice cream and nut-butters in less than 30 SECONDS!?!!!! OH MY GOSH, sounds like I need to end my two yr long relationship with my blender :0( How much does it cost by the way?! Wow, reading blogs makes me wanna buy sooo many things!! Like a grill pan, a waffle maker, a vitamix – can it carry out all the jobs that a food processor does?! eheheh! Have a great day!

  15. Kati says

    Oh yes! I LOVE my Vitamix – couldn’t live without it. I’m sure you two will be very happy together. 🙂

  16. choc_puddin says

    Its beanmix- in an updated blog! (my old one was accidentally deleted!)
    I am very sad to hear of your recently ended relationship. But looks like you’re already on the rebound you sly minx.
    Cant wait to hear about the icecream!

  17. Bianca says

    You lucky girl! You’ve scored the man we’ve all been after. I’ve been crushing on Mr. Vitamix for years, but I’ve always been out of his financial league. He wants a Sugar Mama, someone who can shell out the big bucks to make him happy…I thought about asking my parents for one for Christmas but I think I’m going to ask them for Mr. iPod instead…

  18. vegetalion says

    is mr. food processor on the rebound? I will gladly leave my sad little blender for him.

    don’t tell my blender I said that.


  19. Kimberly says

    Congrats! And it’s true – when a vegan gal has to trade up, she has to trade up. I do hope you let poor Mr. FP down easy. I’m sure he treated you well while it lasted, but let’s face it, in the long term he just couldn’t give you what you really need.

  20. Emmie says

    Oh, I am so jealous! My blender gave up on me last time I made vegan cheese in it. It broke and hot liquid cheese poured all over the kitchen and me. That’s some break up!

  21. chandra says

    That was too adorable. 🙂 I was thinking about getting a food processor… maybe I should look into a Vitamix instead?

  22. Danielle says

    My deepest condolences for the poor Mr. Food Processor. He must be devastated…

    On the other hand, don’t tell him I told you so but… you, missy, can do so much better! I see bright things for you and Vitamix in the future, you two will be very happy together.

    Haha, I love your posts and your blog (and you actually , even if I don’t really know you at all) so I’m going to miss you a lot for the next few days/weeks/idk how long as I begin my study abroad adventure. I cannot wait to see what I missed, take care in the mean time! 🙂

  23. Ruby Red Vegan says

    From the photo it looks like you and the Vitamix are getting along well. So cute! I think we used Vitamixes when I worked at Jamba Juice. I didn’t know they could make nut butters — awesome! It’s no wonder Mr. FP’s rep wouldn’t take your calls. (That part was so funny, by the way!)

    Purely Decadent has a Snickerdoodle flavor?!? I’m so there! That sounds delicious, thanks for the heads-up. And yeah, I didn’t even think about organic chem when I decided on my major. I thought chemistry would be as easy as the class I took sophomore year. I was so wrong! You are a smartie for avoiding it.

  24. Vegan Invasion! (Ashley Nicole) says

    Vitamix?! Awesome!! Congrats!

    I’ve been drooling over them for years; maybe one day I’ll treat myself and pick one up!

  25. Vegyogini says

    That is HUGE news; I’m shocked! Not that you now have a Vitamix, but that poor Mr. FP has been tossed to the side. I’m sure he’s still useful! I don’t have a Vitamix, but I’m very impressed with what you’ve done with it so far…smoothies, ice cream, can’t wait to see what’s next!

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