I’ve been meaning to write this post about why I gave up running for a while…
Although it’s completely unrelated to healthy desserts or recipes, I wanted to publish in case it can help someone out there who might feel like I did a few months ago.
If you were to stumble upon my blog without knowing anything else about me, you might get a picture of this crazy-enthusiastic girl who is always happy, completely carefree, and whose life revolves around food and chocolate and dessert 24/7.
In reality, “blog Katie” is only a very small portion of who I am outside of the computer world.
You might be surprised by how much of my life is entirely unrelated to food and cooking, and I’m definitely not completely carefree.
Related: How I Started Blogging Full Time
Because I choose not to talk about my friends, relationships, or personal life on the blog, most people would’ve had no idea I was anything less than my usual upbeat self early this year…
Yet even as I continued with the cheery chocolate posts, I was feeling overwhelmed and exhausted thanks to moving twice, going through a breakup, sorting out issues with the book, and worrying about the future.
In the past, I would have leaned on running to get me through.
It was in college that I first fell in love with the sport, waking up each day excited to get out in the fresh Pennsylvania air before classes. Running provided an outlet for the pent-up energy I was no longer expending on soccer and tennis (sports I’d played almost from birth all the way through high school), and I could think about everything while I ran: school, friends, guys, the past, the future… or sometimes nothing at all.
Running’s meaning in my life would change over the years; when I moved back to Texas it became a comforting source of stability in my crazy and uncertain post-high-school life. Four or five times a week, sun or rain or snow, I’d be out there running, 7 to 10 miles each time. I loved it.
But somehow this past summer, I lost energy and motivation for something that used to bring such joy and excitement. For the first time in eight years, I found myself dreading the idea of going out for a run.
I would drag myself through the miles and arrive home feeling completely drained. Running had never been something I wanted to force myself to do, so one day in early July when I was “supposed” to go out, I just didn’t.
That one day turned into a week.
The week turned into a month.
Then two months.
And I was surprised to find I didn’t miss it. I had much more energy throughout the day, felt happier and less stressed, and even my hair—no longer breaking off from much-too-tight ponytails—looked healthier.
As people have pointed out in a few of my recent posts, I’ve also gained weight, which I’d been trying to do for awhile (I always wanted curves). Not going to lie, I am pretty excited about this.
(To ease your worries if you want to give up running but do not wish to gain weight: I don’t think quitting running directly caused me to gain weight. My personality is such that I naturally tend to lose weight when I’m stressed and overwhelmed, so the change is a physical manifestation of feeling happier and more relaxed.)
Will I ever go back to running?
Maybe someday in the future, but much more recreationally.
If running works for you, that’s great. Keep doing it! But if you’re feeling burned out by running—or any exercise—it might be a good idea to take a step back for awhile. You can always pick it up again if the desire strikes.
That’s not to say I’m advocating giving up exercise completely: I still walk every morning to get out in the fresh air, and lately I’ve been going with a friend to the gym a few times a week (basically he lifts all the heavy weights and I stand there with my 10-lb dumbbells and exercise my mouth!).
When I first gave up running, I feared losing a part of my identity. But the truth is I now have so much more.
2014 Edit: Part Two: Why I Started Running Again
Recipe Of The Day:
Flourless Pancakes – 3 Ingredients, NO gluten, soy, eggs, or refined sugar
Cecilia says
I strained my back about 6 months ago, and had to give up all my usual forms of exercise. Running, spinning, weightlifting. All of it, gone! After 10 years of constant workouts! I panicked at first, but have come to realuze that I do fine without logging all those hours in the gym and out on the trail. I eat better now, since I’m not constantly starving due to long and tedious workouts, and my bodyweight has actually stayed the same! My back is still in recovery, and I’m in pain most of the time, so I’ve actually quit the gym (!)… That alone will save me 700 dollars (4000kr) a year:) So it’s win-win fir me too!
Cecilia Arvidsson says
I’ve experienced that exact same thing. And it really is true about the nutrition-part of the equation. When I did 5-8 hours of workouts every week I was constantly hungry and always had to watch what I ate to not overdo it. I craved carbs! PASTACARBS:D But now I can eat much more fruit and veggies without feeling like I’m missing something. And my shape has improved A LOT by only lifting weights for a total of 90 minutes per 7 days (!),
Ashlie says
I’m going through this right now. I ran 7-10 miles everyday for the last year…not missing a day even when the wind chill was -20. I knew it my head it was crazy and I am so happy I didn’t injure myself. I’ve cut back to 3-4 times a week, with shorter runs. I however am starting to feel anxious about the weight gain…really anxious. I am also vegan and feel though I eat not refined sugar or grains I do eat too many fruit based carbs and too little protein. I really struggle with figuring out how to get in more protein…my main sources are nuts, beans, and seeds. Where do you get most of your protein?
A says
Katie, I so appreciate this post and absolutely identify with all that you wrote. I love(d) running too until I realized it was something I “had” to do. It was a trap and so far removed from the reasons why I loved it in the first place! I appreciate your transparency and pray that you will continue to find freedom and peace in your decision to run or not to run.
Rose says
Katie, thank you so much for your blog and recipes. You look great, by the way! I kept beating myself up for having lost the love of running, I once had. As got into my 30s, I seemed to get slower and slower and more and more drained. It helped knowing that I am not the only one who no longer runs, even though at one point it was what brought me so much joy. You mentioned you go to the gym…Have you tried biking or rollerblading? Sometimes switching things up makes outdoor excersing more fun. Thanks for all your desert recipes! I have been sharing them with my brother and sis and can’t wait for my nephew and niece to try your healthy fudge recipe– delicious!! Thanks for sharing your easy recipes, and your experiences with running.
em says
I’m giving up extreme walking in hopes of it helping my fertility (I currently am experiencing ammenohrea)… it is SO challenging for me but I can relate to you. I’m only on day three, but I am so much more ME with the extra time I have in my days now! and my body is so much less sore! you rarely, if ever, read a bout anyone giving up exercise so I’m so glad you wrote this and I came across it when I did. thank you for the inspiration!
Tara says
OMG so I just stumbled upon this.. while searching pb and molasses which is something I enjoyed as a child and was lookig for recipes… anyway the real point is are you the Katie who loved vendetta red in college? I followed a Katie on something like myspace or one of those online forums back in 2002ish… abyway she ran, like I did and loved baking, like I did, and I’m pretty sure she was in pennisylvania cause she was all about the fall weather and running in it.. what stuck out most tho was vendetta red because I became a fan …anyway…let me know if you are her that would be insane. Hahah.
Amanda Haselden says
I don’t know HOW I’m just coming across this post, but I had to laugh out loud at the “third a jar of peanut butter mixed with coconut oil.” I thought I was the ONLY person to do this! I am a crazy runner as well, and am constantly, voraciously hungry. I LOVE good, healthy fats, and sometimes tend to go overboard. My obsession is actually cashew butter with coconut oil, but same idea, right? 🙂 Thanks for sharing and helping me know I’m not alone in that lol!
Chocolate Covered Katie says
Haha this made me smile to see your comment too. My current favorite is peanut butter mixed with sunflower oil, cacao powder, chia seeds, and a little salt and maple syrup. Or Trader Joes mixed nut butter with carob powder… an attempt to try and add variety to my diet.
There’s just something about eating straight from the jar… 🙂
Secret says
I love your honesty! You look great and I’m glad you took care of yourself and listened to your body. I love all your recipes.
Kim says
Hi Katie!
I love your blog, and have been a fan of your recipes ever since trying your black bean brownies. Didn’t know we shared this obsessive exercise thing. I still love exercise, but it is not connected with self hate, punishment, body hatred, or inability to express emotions. I am really grateful. This obsession was brutal. And not many people get it bc « exercise is good for you ». Anyway thank you for sharing!
Rick S says
When your recipes call for chocolate (chips, melted, etc.), what do you use? Or do you make your own chocolate?
CCK Media Team says
We like Enjoy Life or Pacari. But feel free to use your favorite!